Thursday, September 04, 2008

Chewing on it.

I am going to pretend I have been here the whole time cause every time I think of how much time has passed I cringe a bit, mainly because I have no memory and part of the reason I bother to blog is to relive moments I would otherwise forget.

Read the warning on the side of the Midol box the other day as I was searching for the dosage chart and part of the warning label stated that if you have trouble urinating as a result of an enlarged prostrate consult a physician prior to use.

This past weekend on a family outing I popped a piece of chewing gum. My children have always been fascinated with chewing gum and bubble gum and the whole concept of chewing something without swallowing and blowing bubbles etc. Even if the stuff is small and stiff they insist on my powering out one small bubble sometimes until my jaws are hurting but they are so amazed I try to keep the show rolling. Sometime however when I'm not in the mood to perform I try to hide it and if they spy some bright colored substance when I speak they are quick to call it, "is that gum mom?", Nope I reply and try to move on, "but I saw something bright yellow what is it ? I saw you chewing it is gum. Is it bubble gum Mom can you blow a bubble?" No guys its just chewing gum no bubbles. "Can you snap it mom we love when you snap it .........................." However daunting this sounds I have always insisted that the kids were not of an age where they could responsibly chew or dispose of the sticky sweetness properly and they have always complied. I have to admit my pointing out the choking dangers of such a substance over and over has helped to keep their curiosity at a voyeuristic level. This weekend however was different as the twins are on the verge of a big milestone, TURNING FIVE!! This is a huge event and you would not believe the doors this milestone will open (at least in the mind of my precious little potatoes). So I was quite surprised when Popeye asked if he would in fact be old enough to chew gum when he was five. I pondered it and considering the grand idealization these kids have with their ever approaching birthday I decided yes yes indeed five was old enough to start chewing gum once they learned the rules.

1. Only chew gum when Mom allows it and supplies the product.
2. Chew with mouth closed.
3. You may swallow the juice (as Pixie calls it) but never the gum.
4. Gum stays in mouth until disposal no fingers involved during the chewing.
5. Disposal is straight into trashcan and never never on grass or other ground ( I had to impress upon them the awfulness of having gum stuck to the bottom of ones shoe).
6. Bubble blowing will not be allowed until the art of chewing gum is mastered as gum torpedo's may ensue and I was not into flying gum wads at any juncture in our adventure.
7. At any time all rules are not followed gum privileges are revoked at Mom ma's discretion.

With that under our belt I dispensed half a piece of sugarless gum to the children and waited for the reaction. They were nervous at first and kept having me check to make sure it was there. They also had difficulty talking with the small product in their mouth and if I didn't know better I would swear these two had a sock in their mouths. I had to remind the two of the need to close the mouth when chewing. They really felt like big kids and I smiled and wondered if my first gum chewing experience was just as huge?!!!


April said...

Mags I love your writing you are so funny!! I know the twins loved the gum and isn't the consentrated looks they have on their little faces the best!

Maggie said...

Ah she is here glad to have you kid. Can't wait till our little pale one has his baby blues for the world to see.

Marybeth said...

welcome back maggie, watch out for gum on plate, this is a habit that my daughter picked up.

Maggie said...

OOh yea thats a bad one too. Sorry about the hiatus sometimes i start living my life and forget to blog about it.

Marybeth said...

I know what you mean